From A (amiability) to Z (zen) the dictionary that tells a man how to turn into a gentleman.
“Gentleman” is a word full of meaning that has partially changed its connotation over time. Being a gentleman does not depend on social position, a gentleman is who treats others with the utmost respect, is the one who does not take advantage of its potential strength, it is who does not offends in any way and for any reason.
The gentleman, the word itself says, is first of all kind. Synonymous with courtesy, politeness, pleasantness, politeness, it is sometimes mistaken for weakness of character.
Brevity, conciseness, love of synthesis. A gentleman is quite economical in expressing themselves, if people use too many words, it means they do not know what they are talking about, or they are trying to deceive you.
Which means being able to find your way both in the streets of Beijing and in those in New York, know how to appreciate a Tuscan as much as French cusine without losing your aplomb, and always know how to respect the customs of others.
A means but not an end , to be respected but now worshipped, neither to be stashed away nor to be shown off. Better if earned with talents and preserved with elegance if inherited.
You will never know if elegance is either an inborn or acquired quality, is an eternal dilemma. What is important is to know how to choose clothes and accessories that fit your body and your spirit.
Close relative of the courage and strength of character, which is essential in a gentleman.
Good taste or bad taste can make life better or worse, but the gentleman, no matter how confident in his taste, prefers not to dictate his self-confidence to anyone.
Humor, often mistaken for witticism, is the tendency to react to daily hassles with a sense of fun or a hint of irony.
Even at the risk of being dandy, exasperated and reckless variant of the genre, the gentleman abhors conformity. It is not asked at all if his action is in accordance with the common behaviors on average, he knows to be the most severe judge of himself.
As sure of his own identity, taste and elegance, the gentleman is anything but a solipsist and knows well having to communicate with everyone. How to talk to non-gentlemen? At first, as if they too, then trying to avoid them.
Keeping your word, do tricks and cunning petty, behave loyalty: these are the fundamental characteristics of a gentleman.
The ability to cope in any occasion with a mixture of intelligence and courage. This is the result not only of talented, but also of experiences and long practice, all driven by the idea that only if something is done well, it is worth doing.
There was a time when only people of noble birth would be regarded as gentleman, but the great bourgeois revolutions have overturned that conviction – convention: the nobility must be won and what matters is the nobleness of soul.
It exist only in the exact sciences, but there are good faith and loyalty of judgment, applying the same standards to other measurement that you would like to apply to themselves.
It may be because of the English stereotype, it will be because of an apparent self-control and equanimity, the gentleman is likely to give a cold and insensitive, while in his heart he agrees with Hegel that says “nothing great in the world has been accomplished without passion”.
The gentleman prefer it to the amount, not for cultural reasons, but because it leads to advantageous results over a long period. Choosing, instead of amassing things, is the logic of a good collector and usually a gentleman is a collector, looking for quality in objects, people and acquaintances.
Should not be taken for sophistication or even for decadent aestheticism. Real refinement comes after a long journey on the path of simplicity. You do not need to imitate Cary Grant, you need to be like him in your unique way.
Charming, seductive and charisma of gentlemen make infuriate ordinary mortals.
Virtue overrated and overused, the gentleman can tolerate weaknesses but not the mischief. The social sanction imposed by the gentleman is very simple: keep away from the rascal.
According to the Greek etymology meaning “place that does not exist “. The positive utopia refers to a company so happy, harmonious and perfect to find a place only in the imagination. The gentleman, rational person, loves utopias but he believes in more pratical ideals.
Stay away from useless platitudes and proverbs, the gentleman asks what he really wants and whether it is worthwhile to make it happen.
A gentleman does not like to philosophise, at worst he prefers to think and analyze situations as would a sociologist or an economist, anchoring the abstract rules to concrete cases. But he has got a soft spot for Zen thinking.